Last minute emotions.....

Throughout the pregnancy I have experienced quite a bit of emotions from crying for no reason, to being super happy, grumpy, angry, scared, etc. but up until now I haven't actually had time to dwell on any of them and just figured they were all pregnancy related. Well now as I gear up to the last days of being pregnant 19 days and counting, I want to reflect on some emotions that Ive been experiencing recently......

Overjoyed-
I am beyond overjoyed to be the mommy of a newborn again, to be able to have experienced what has been a pretty normal pregnancy, almost making it full term(next week I will be) and being able to watch Ethan grow up and have a little sister with him always and forever.

Excited-
I'm sooooo excited to see what this little princess looks like, Will she look like me? Will she look like Ethan? What color hair will she have? Eyes? I know she will be gorgeous but just to be able to hold her and see her in my arms, in Shauna's arms, in Ethan's arms looking up at us and just being as innocent as she can be.

Scared-
Having surgery, another cesarean, being cut open and going thru abdominal surgery which any surgery of any kind is scary and I know this is all route, but I'm so very scared of the pain I will feel after, of the recovery time with a newborn and a 5 year old. The actual surgery is scary too, I cant feel my legs, I'm being cut open through all my insides and they are being moved around. I watch to many reality shows of people getting tools left in them lol I should stop. I know I will have tons of help after she is born but doing the surgery thing all over again is scary, very very scary!

Saddened-
Yes, I'm very sad because I'm am approaching the final weeks of my pregnancy and this is the last time I will ever be pregnant, I know our family of 4 will be perfect but just the thought of never having another child(I still will be able to) but we have decided that there will be no more kids which is OK with me but just knowing that this is the last time Ill see a positive pregnancy test, feel the movements of a tiny baby moving inside me, all the not so pleasant feelings even though they suck Ill miss them lol and just not being a mommy to another one :-/

All of the above......
This pregnancy has been so different compared to the previous pregnancy and yes even though they were twins and shes a singleton it still seems so different from 1st trimester symptoms-nausea, bloated, sleepy, hungry to 2nd trimester symptoms- heartburn, indigestion, feeling her move, to 3rd trimester symptoms- thins Ive never even experienced with the boys at all the rolling, tumbling, pressure, and just the overall fact that I have made it this far. Its been 10 weeks longer than the boys were born and I am absolutely blessed to be able to experience all the things that I have thus far. There has been some complications but nothing to bad and some scary things but they have all worked themselves out. I absolutely LOVE the feeling of being pregnant, I LOVE the feeling of being able to grow a small human being into a baby that will be able to live outside the womb on her very own. I LOVE feeling her inside me moving, kicking, rolling, and having hiccups. The fact that this is pretty much my last time getting pregnant ever does make me very sad but also knowing that if we decided we want to have another we will have the option but I think were done. I am more than excited, words cant even explain how I feel and how rejoiced I am to be a mother again and be able to see her precious little face. I'm getting so close and even though I am filled with excitement, nervousness, anxiety, etc I could not be happier that its so close to meeting our princess!!!